Mymate Marmite

MY MATE MARMITE

EVERY MORNING ABOUT EIGHT

I GO TO THE CUPBOARD AND LOOK FOR MY MATE

I LIKE IT ESPECIALLY WITH BUTTER ON TOAST

I PROBABLY HAVE IT I BIT MORE THAN MOST

I LOVE THE BLACK AND YELLOW LID JARS

I WONDER IF THEY HAVE IT ON MARS

I KNOW SOME DISLIKE IT BUT I  AM NOT ONE

I HAVE HAD  MY OBSESSION SINCE THE  AGE OF 1

IT WAS A COMPULSION THAT STUCK TO MY TONGUE

I HAVE LOVED IT ON SOLDIERS SINCE I WAS YOUNG

DIPPED INTO  THE YOLK OF AN EGG THAT IS RUNNY

SOME PEOLPE MAY LAUGH AND THINK  THAT IM FUNNY

IT’S BLACK ITS GOOEY ITS A STICKY IT’S  GUNGE

 I HAVE IT IN BETWEEN A VICTORIA SPONGE

A WAFER THIN LAYER SPREAD PERFECTLY RIGHT

I EVEN GET CRAVINGS IN THE MIDDLE OF NIGHT

STILL LOVE IT IN  A SANDWICH WITH CRISPS WITH A CRUNCH

I AM A LITTLE OCD BUT STILL THE BEST OF THE BUNCH

I GOT VERY DISTRESSED WHEN THE SHOP HAD SOLD OUT

SO I STARTED TO HOARD THEM SO THERE WAS NO DOUBT

I HAVE 100 JARS UNDER THE BED

ANOTHER 200 IN THE GARDEN SHED

I HAVE SOME IN THE LOFT AND IM READY TO FEAST

I CANNOT GO WITHOUT MY EXTRACT OF YEAST

I WENT TO THE SHOPS AND NOTICED SOMETHING QUITE STRANGE

THE LITTLE BLACK JARS WERE NO WHERE IN RANGE

I LOOKED UP EVERY ISLE BUT TO NO AVAIL

THE STAFF THAT WORKED THERE WERE AS SLOW AS A SNAIL

SO WITHOUT HESITATION I BEGAN MY DETECTION

I THINK I WILL NEED MUCH FURTHER INSPECTION

THERE WERE  THESE LITTLE GREEN MEN  TAKING THE JARS BY THE SCORE

 OBVIOUSLY ALIENS  FLYING OUT THE BACK DOOR

THEY SAID THEY WOULD REWARD ME IF I COULD SUPPLY THEM WITH MORE

SO I ACTED ALL INNOCENT AND I KNOW IT SOUNDS CRUEL

BUT I THINK THEY WERE USING IT AS  THERE ALIEN FUEL

THEY WERE TURNING THE JARS INTO FLYING SPACESHIPS

I COULDN’T TELL THEM I LIKE MINE ON CHIPS

SO I LEFT RATHER SHARPLY AND TOLD NO-ONE BUT YOU

THE LITTLE GREEN MEN INTO THE SKY THEY ALL FLEW

SO I NOW LOOK UP TO THE STARS  AT NIGHT 

AND STILL EAT UP MY MATE I CALL IT MARMITE

I KNOW YOU MIGHT THINK IM A VERY STRANGE FELLOW

BUT I DO LOVE THE STUFF IN A JAR BLACK AND YELLOW